That's intense
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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