Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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