home. puking in laundry basket.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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