Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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