Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize