I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
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