But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize