'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
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