Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
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