mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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