so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize