I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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