He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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