Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
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