yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize