you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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