My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize