So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
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I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
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I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize