There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize