This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
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