i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
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Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
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it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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