i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
where am i from again
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize