I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize