It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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