we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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