Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize