Say something about gay babies.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
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