Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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