my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
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