I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
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It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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