i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Randomize