Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize