69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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