i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize