Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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