so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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