I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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