Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize