I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
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This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
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Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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