So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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