and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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