apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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