They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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