Tell her she can't have a vagina
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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