Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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