You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize