the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
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