Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize