i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I have aggressive nipples.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize