You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize